Parenting Spotlight #7

This week is the last week in the first section of our Parenting Spotlight series. I’m excited to introduce to you my pastor, Ted. I first met Ted when he was the young adult pastor at our church. Several years later, we moved with him when he, with the support of our church, planted a new church in another part of our city. Over the years we have appreciated Ted’s wisdom, learned and been challenged by his teaching, and enjoyed his and his family’s friendship.

So grab a cup of coffee, pull up a chair, and enjoy a visit with my friend, Ted, as he talks about our calling as parents.

Hey, Ted! Thanks for joining us. Tell us a little bit about yourself.
I’ve been married to Jen for 15 years. We met our senior year in high school and then dated for the last two years of college – getting married a week after I graduated. I love Jen because she is everything I am not. She is grounded, not easily distracted, classy, thoughtful, organized, consistent, quiet, and persistent. These differences cause friction at times because there are differences, but I love it because I am able to be more who I am because she balances me perfectly. We have one son, Trey, who will be 8 in January – and he has an amazing mind. He is able to think abstractly and pull together ideas from various sources to have a great discussion about everything from gravity and the solar system to the trinity and theology. Claire is our amazing kindergartener who is always making us laugh. She is intense and also very funny. She has recently starting doing impressions of people, and we’ve received stares at restaurants as we are rolling with laughter at her antics.

What has being a parent taught you about your relationship with God?
Being a parent is a continual learning process and ever growing source of enlightenment about how my Father must feel about me. More than anything, the concept of unconditional love and grace has moved from being simply a commitment that God has made to an emotional love that He has for me that includes joy and tears and smiles and frustrations. I also am growing ever deeper in my understanding that God has a plan for me and orchestrates things in my life that I will never be able to grasp.

How do you guard your time with your family against the other demanding pulls in your life?
Because the demands on my time are seemingly “infinite,” I have made clear boundaries in my life. First, I never make appointments or commitments past 4:00 in the afternoon, so that I can always been home by 5:30 for dinner. I also try, as much as possible, to schedule evening meetings for a time after the kids are in bed … this means that leadership meetings often start at 8:00. I also try to get up early in the morning for time with Father before the demands of everything else comes swirling in. Finally, I have people in my life who hold me accounta! ble to k eeping life simple – remembering that I can’t do everything I might want to. I have to say “no” so that I can “yes” to what is absolutely most vital and important. One last thing – I see “games” or other events that my kids do as appointments that allow me to say that I am not available for something else. I can always meet with someone the next day or week, but I can’t get that game back.

Many people consider the call to vocational ministry as they only type of “high calling.” How is parenting just as high a calling as vocational ministry?
It is unfortunate that people make distinctions like that. Ministry is simply being used by God to be conduit of His mercy and grace. This can happen any where, and every follower of Christ has this call on their life. Aside from the Old Testament prophets and New Testament apostles, the call to a “vocational” ministry is not the norm for the people of God. What is the norm is that everyone plays a part. As a person in “full-time” ministry, I simply see myself as someone whom the body has freed up to serve full-time because of training, gifting, and availability. The ministry of serving my family is my primary ministry and then comes my ministry with the church. My ministry is always to whoever is in front of me – it just so happens that my family is in front of me everyday!

So how do we live up to that high calling?
First, we live up to that calling by taking it seriously and seeing it as a calling – it is ministry, just as much as anything else. Second, we live up to that high calling by investing as much time, energy, and creativity into it as anything other calling. Third, we see it as ministry and theref! ore allo w the Father to lead us and give us the energy we need to accomplish. Finally, I to understand that my family is not about me – it is about me being used by the Father to do what He desires. I am serving Him.

Ted, thank you so much for sharing your insight with us today.

I hope you were encouraged by Ted’s words just as much as I was. One thing I love about him and his family is that even though they are in such an important leadership position, they are accessible to us and are trying to live authentic lives. We are blessed to call him not only pastor, but dear friend. Check out his blog for some more great insight into walking out our faith.

To read the other interviews in this series, click here.

For more inspiration regarding your high calling, no matter what your profession, visit High Calling Blogs.

Parenting Spotlight #6

I met my friend Leslie at Mount Hermon four years ago. Her wicked sense of humor and exceptional thoughtfulness attracted me to her immediately. Since then, I have enjoyed our continued friendship and always learn something new from her. She’s a humor columnist, speaker to wives and moms, and my sweet friend.

Tell me a little bit about yourself.
I will have been married to Bret 20 years in August. Unbelievable! I feel younger than I did then in many ways. We have three children: Charlie, 16, began driving this summer, which has deepened my prayer life considerably; Molly, 13, keeps us laughing with her wit; and Reese, 12, who’s into every sport imaginable.

What do you love about being a mom?
What I love most about being a mom is talking with my kids, instead of at them. It’s been a joy as they’ve grown to move past hundreds of directives daily (brush your teeth, finish your dinner, find your cleats) to having conversations about their daily lives, their relationships with God, and their futures. At different times all three have done some acting and modeling which has given us alone time in the car, going to shoots, that we might not otherwise have had. We’re working at finding that balance between parent and friend as they mature and become teenagers.

I love seeing their relationships with the Lord grow and deepen. Last Christmas we all shared how we came to know Christ (yes, tears abounded). What a blessing for any mom to hear her children testify to their growing faith. I’m thankful they’re all three moving beyond being Christians because their parents are to being followers of Christ, searching for His will and leading in their lives.

I love watching them play anything and everything. They’ve played just about every sport and taken piano and been in a youth chorus, so we have lots of opportunities to go to games and concerts. Since their Dad has been their coach on many occasions, I can honestly say I’m their #1 fan!

What’s tough about being a mom?
Unlike many of my friends, who seem to be consumed with worry (driving, grades, boy/girl relationships), the Lord has graciously spared me from those kinds of all-consuming fears. However, what’s tough is letting go. I don’t hover–never have–but I do project. I imagine how quiet the house will be when they’re all gone. I wonder what Bret and I will do when we have no more ball games to go to.

Another thing that’s tough is seeing potential in them (for good grades, for serving God, for being leaders) that goes untapped. I don’t like it when I want something for them more than they want it for themselves. I struggle with letting this go.

How did you incorporate God and the Bible into your daily lives?
We read it often, almost every day, as a family when the kids were younger. Though we don’t generally still read it aloud together as much now that they’re all 12 and up, we discuss passages, stories and people and how they relate to our lives now. We also used different devotional books, especially Sticky Situations, which had stories that related to the here and now. In fact, I wrote my own set of stories related to situational ethics called Daily Dilemmas, based on whatever my kids were going through at the time. (For example, when my daughter went through a lying phase, I wrote dilemmas about it. She saw consequences of lies for the kids in the stories. In a month or so, she had abandoned the lies.)

We prayed together as a family–sharing needs (ranging from our personal situations to foreign missions). We still do this a lot: before road trips, before tests or milestones (important games, school presentations, dates).

What does it mean to you when I say, “Parenting is a high calling”?
That God has surely placed a call on our role as parents. And what He has purposed for us to do, He will equip us with every good thing to do that job. While I might feel confused or frustrated at times as a mom, I know without doubt that doing so not only pleases the Lord, but also brings Him glory. Finally, I believe our role as parent needs to come before other “jobs” that we have–our vocation, our hobbies, our friendships. The only relationships that deserve a higher rank are those with God Himself and with our husbands.

How would you suggest a parent live up to this high calling when they feel woefully inadequate?
First, don’t dwell on the inadequacies. Satan loves to render us ineffective by making us think we’re unworthy, incapable, unlovable. Second, see yourself how the Lord sees you. God reveres the job of wife and mother. Third, rest in the peace that where your efforts fall short, God is there to pick up the slack. Jesus stands in the gap of our inadequacies and makes our meager parenting offering complete.

Thanks for sharing with us, Leslie!

I hope you enjoyed spending some time with Leslie. Check out her website for some great tips and humorous articles.

To read the other interviews in this series, click here.

For more inspiration regarding your high calling, no matter what your profession, visit High Calling Blogs.

Parenting Spotlight #5

We’re kicking off 2008 with a real treat. Parenting expert Brenda Nixon is making a stop here during her month-long blog tour. Just by coordinating her blog tour I’ve learned so many great parenting tips and ways to improve my parenting. She is the mother of two, grown daughters and currently lives in Ohio with her husband and dachshund. So without further ado, here’s Brenda.

Hi Brenda! First, tell us a little bit about yourself and your hobbies.
I travel to speak at parenting and childcare conferences, schools, churches, MOPS groups, parent expos, or anywhere I’m invited if the audience lives or works with kids. Since there’s a marriage between speaking and writing, I also write books and magazine articles about child behavior and guidance. With my education background, I’m contracted to teach Ohio Health & Safety curriculum to childcare providers, and I am adjunct faculty at an Ohio university.

I don’t have a declared hobby, but cultivate myriad interests including garage sales, gardening and landscaping, volunteering with the Humane Society, bicycling, playing with my dachshund, Opie (I’m co-authoring a book of devotions for dog lovers), and learning about and watching hummingbirds. I also read anything that interests me, from Cesar Milan’s book on dog behavior, to Stephen King’s book On Writing, to child development research and parenting magazines, to religious publications.

What does it mean to you if I say, “Parenting is a high calling”?
To me, it’s an honor and heavy responsibility to become a parent. If you think about it, raising children is like a pastor who has a congregation. The Bible says leaders will be judged more carefully. We are leaders to our kids; raising them to be healthy, happy, well-adjusted kids, but also with a faith in our heavenly Father. And we’ll be answerable to God for our attitude toward and efforts in parenting. As stated in my upcoming book, “Parenting demands enormous time, patience, creativity, faith, and inspiration. . . . From birth to 18 years, 85 percent of your child’s waking, learning hours are spent, not in the classroom but, in your living room. You are his first and most influential teacher.” Whether I’m speaking/writing to secular or faith-based parents, I encourage them to recognize their awesome calling in raising the kids they were given.

I really want to take advantage of your parenting expertise while you’re here. How do you balance teaching grace and obedience?
The balance of grace and obedience is the same as balancing rules and relationship. It is difficult, but you can do it by remembering some of what kids do is normal childish behavior and not defiance. Avoid being the tyrant (all rules), and avoid being a pushover (all relationship).

Practice understanding kids. They are going through life for the first time and may not understand what you want of them, or they really didn’t hear you, or they’re fickle and got distracted. That’s when you get down on their eye-level, look them in the face and repeat yourself. I found that asking my girls to say back to me what I just said, internalized the statement for them.

Sometimes, I feel like unless I raise my voice, my child just doesn’t take me seriously. How do I get him to obey without raising my voice?
Oh, that’s a common question, so you’re in good company. Youngsters are perceptive and pick up on messages we send. If you always yell to get your child’s attention, he has learned that you don’t mean what you say until you yell. In a way, you’ve taught him to equate yelling with obedience.

Try this: next time you see an inappropriate behavior, correct your child in a soft, matter-of-fact tone. He may look at you and not take you seriously. Then, get up and touch your child on the arm or get on his eye-level, look him in the face, and repeat yourself. You may need to physically assist him in doing what he’s told.

You don’t have to get mad to discipline. Practice using a lower voice. Then if that doesn’t work, put some action behind your words.

What has being a parent taught you about your relationship with God?
That’s a provocative question, and one I’ve thought about many times while in the throws of raising kids and also writing /speaking to parents. One parallel is kinda funny, but true. Take toilet teaching for example. We know that we can’t teach a child toilet use until she is ready. Likewise, God can only teach us new concepts and maturity when we’re ready. In toilet teaching, we must be patient, loving, consistent, and clear in our expectations. Isn’t that what God is, with us?

Also, being a parent has taught me the only Perfect Parent is in heaven. Thankfully, we can rely on Him for direction. And being a personable God, I believe He works through persons. That’s why I encourage parents to read material and go to parenting seminars to learn as much as possible about childrearing. We can learn from other persons who God may be working through to teach us.

Thanks for sharing with us today, Brenda. I appreciate you stopping by to share some of your expertise with us.

I love that Brenda offers practical advice on how to fulfill our high calling as parents. She’s published a great resource called Power Parenting in the Early Years, has posted several parenting articles on her website, and is available as a speaker. You can also sign up for a weekly parenting tip to be delivered right to your inbox. Be sure to stop by her website and check out all of those resources.

Also, be sure to check out the next stop on Brenda’s blog tour: Melodee at Unretouched Photo. You can also visit her previous stop at 5 Minutes for Mom.

To read the other interviews in this series, click here.

For more inspiration regarding your high calling, no matter what your profession, visit High Calling Blogs.

Parenting Spotlight #4

In light of Christmas being five days away, I wanted to take this week for some time of reflection. Next week we’ll get back to the interviews as I shine the spotlight on my friend Leslie.

Open your Bible to Luke 1:26 and following. I encourage you to read the actual passage and imagine yourself there, as I share with you how I envision it.

A young girl named Mary sits alone in her room, thinking about her future with this man named Joseph and wondering when he will arrive to take her as his bride. Suddenly, a strange man appears (I don’t know if he just appears or perhaps knocks at her door) and greets her with some strange words. She’s not exactly sure what he means by them, and the look on her face causes the man to reassure her. He then tells her that she will be pregnant and that this child will be the King of the world. Her immediate reaction, of course, is to ask how, since pregnancy was biologically impossible. The man explains that God will cause her pregnancy. He then gives her some additional validation by sharing that her relative Elizabeth is also pregnant. And then he reassures her that everything is possible with God. Mary responds with a heart to serve and a belief in what the man said.

I read this passage this week with a new respect for Mary. Her response to this crazy, unheard of situation was dependence and trust in God. I mean, just think about her trying to explain the situation to her family and friends. Would you believe it if a young girl told you she was pregnant but had taken no measures to become pregnant? And then what if she tried to tell you that not only was she miraculously pregnant, but her child would be the King of the world? I’d probably smile, and then whisper to my friends that the girl was in denial, or perhaps crazy. I imagine that she felt alone and overwhelmed. That it was difficult to talk with others about what was happening to her. Perhaps that’s why she went to stay with Elizabeth for a while.

And yet, she continues to praise God. She accepts her high calling with grace and confidence in who God is. I believe she must have had a trust in Him that ran deep enough to believe He would equip her to do what He called her to do. This crazy, impossible situation would result in bringing the Son of God into the world, and she felt privileged to play a role in that.

Do we as parents have that kind of dependence on God? We’re not raising the King of the world, but our children are created in His image. Even when God calls us to do the seemingly impossible – whether it’s raising a child or remaining in a job we hate – it’s in order to bring His Son into this world. Mary’s story this week has helped me see my high calling with new eyes. When He calls me to do something, I hope I respond with “I am the Lord’s servant. May it be to me as you have said.”

Happy Christmas!

To read the interviews in this series, click here.

For more inspiration regarding your high calling, no matter what your profession, visit High Calling Blogs.

Parenting Spotlight #3

This week I am so excited to shine the spotlight on a new friend, Kellie. We have a mutual friend here in town, and I discovered Kellie B’s blog through her. I love the way she starts out each post with a letter to her children – what a treasure for each of them to have. You can see her genuine love for her family and how she views her role as a parent as a high calling, simply through her words.

So pull up a chair, and join me in listening to Kellie.

Hey Kellie! Thanks so much for joining us. Tell me a little bit about yourself.
I am 31 years old, have been married for 8 years, and live in my home town with 7- and 4-1/2-year-old boys & a 4 month old daughter. Four of my family members live within a mile of me, and I call them regularly to help me with my little joys that I cannot sometimes keep fed, happy, helped, and wiped all at the same time. I also have an amazing group of friends that love Jesus and my family well.

What’s one thing you love about each member of your family?
One thing that I love about the members of my family? That is easy! I love that when my husband is around the family feels whole, that he can somehow clean a room in minutes that would have taken me all day, and that he loves the outdoors. I love that my 7-year-old has a sensitive heart, still calls me mommy, hugs me in public, teaches his brother, and is interested in his sister who can only spit up and smile. Yet, he loves to compliment burps, play in the creek, and would rather play his Nintendo than well, anything else. I love that my 4-year-old still thinks that pants are long shorts, eats just about anything, and worships his brother. Sweet baby girl is my sugar muffin! I love that she has the fattest little cheeks, kicks her legs in the air when she sees me after a nap, and that she owns a pair of baby leg warmers…the cutest thing ever!

How did you incorporate God and the Bible into your daily lives?
Let me tell you that there is not much structure when it comes to family quiet times or reading the Bible around here these days. I take the Montessori, hands-on approach to incorporating God in our lives! One of my favorite things to do is pray with the kids anywhere we are, for them to know that God always hears you and that prayer happens at other places then the dinner table and at night. I love to bless them before they get out of the car with simple things like, “Blessings to you today sweet boy.” I love to remind my oldest, who has accepted Christ, that the Holy Spirit lives in him so he is able to do things like practicing self control in the class room or stop making noises that I have never heard come from a human being before. When I discipline them I tell them that their disobedience is sin, I put a name to it, and when they say they are sorry I look them dead in the eye and tell them “I forgive you.” I want them to know that forgiveness is easy and imperative in relationships, especially with Christ. My hope is that by making repentance easy with me, it will flow into an authentic relationship with Christ, and they will never fear or question his forgiveness. My favorite thing: telling my kids the gospel from day one. I want my kids to have heard the greatest love story from as far back as they can remember. What a privilege to be the first person to share the cross with your child!

What has being a parent of young children taught you about your relationship with God?
You will have to do a follow up interview when I am old, but I hope there will not be another time in life that my walk with Christ is so sporadic. I have learned that time with God will not look the same each day, with coffee, a cozy reading chair, and picking up where the Lord and I left off yesterday. Those days are long gone. I feel like I have a fast food relationship with God, but he always gets my order right! I know he has a neon sign in heaven that says “Open 24/7.” Good thing because I am coming to Him all the time: at 2 a.m. with a son’s earache, 5 a.m. feeding baby, 7:55 a.m. watching my son and his Hot Wheels backpack disappear around the corner of the school as he runs to class, 20 minutes before that praying he finds his shoes, that my husband would be blessed and set apart at work, and that God would postpone the nervous breakdown until I am not the only adult in the house, and the times that it feels like I am so far away from Him I know He hears my silence.

If you knew a young mom who was struggling to see how doing laundry and changing diapers was holy, what would you say?
I would ask this sweet girl, “Are you kidding?” Every time you touch that sweet baby you are practicing holiness. Every time you feed him or her, you are showing him life, kissing him love, praying over him perseverance, tickling him joy, rocking him peace, correct him self control, answering him over and over and over patience, and training him to share goodness, to give kindness, and to carry the cross faith. Being holy does not have to be huge; it is a matter of the heart. You are the vessel chosen by God to pass to the next generation the purity & grace of the cross. You have Christ in you, and when He sees you He sees Jesus and His holiness whether you feel it or not. Be encouraged.

If that same mom said she wanted to believe you, but was still struggling to do so, what would you advise her to do?
I would encourage her to start praying for her child. First, that she would see her son or daughter the way that Christ sees them and know that He sees her that way as well. Secondly, start praying to love what she has been called to do. One night I was struggling with one of my children. I got him in my lap, and he fell asleep soon after. Then I just started praying for him. I started with his head, and out loud I said “Jesus, thank you for his head. Jesus, thank you for his mind. Jesus, thank you for his eyes, for his nose, mouth, lungs, arms, hands, fingers.” I went from head to toe and took my time thanking Jesus for my son. Let me tell you, those few minutes were the heart change I needed. (You have to do this while they are sleeping and so still and sweet – not awake & driving you crazy!)

Kellie, your words have been so insightful! Any parting comments?
There will be times that things are out of sorts, priorities need to be shifted. Finding the happy medium is nothing but a struggle sometimes. I have to remember that holiness does not come in a hurry, and it comes by returning to the cross and putting myself in places to know my Heavenly Father more.

Thank you so much for stopping by. I love your heart for your family and am so encouraged in my high calling as a parent.

To read the interviews in this series, click here.

For more inspiration regarding your high calling, no matter what your profession, visit High Calling Blogs.

Parenting Spotlight #2

I am so grateful to have a loving, supportive, and encouraging husband. He is an amazing dad and already has such a special relationship with our daughter. I love watching them together and hearing them in the other room giggling and playing. It continues to amaze me that God provided such an amazing partner with whom I get to walk through this life.

I’m excited to shine the parenting spotlight on my husband this week. Interviewing him was a total blast and gave me additional insight into him as a parent. I know you’ll be encouraged by his words; I sure was!

How has being a parent changed you?
I definitely value the family unit more. For example, before becoming a dad, if I saw a story on the news about parents who have lost a child or kids who are losing their parents, I’d just think it was sad. Now, it affects me deeply. I think about how this wonderful little bond that our family shares, is being destroyed for these people. Granted, not every family situation is as nice as ours, but it’s still tragic. I’ve just become more aware of and value the family core more.

What do you love about being a dad?
I love watching our daughter grow and change so much in a short period of time. I love it when she’s excited to see me when I come home from work. I like going and doing daddy-daughter things with her, like taking her to new places and watching her excitement about what she’s seeing and exploring. I also like it when we just sit out on the back porch, watching her run around, climb on things, and talk to us. I enjoy bath time because she’s so funny. Talk about an evolution! She used to just splash a little, but now she jumps in the air, lands on her bottom, and I get drenched. But we both laugh a lot and have fun.

What’s tough about being a dad?
It’s stressful and scary knowing that the responsibility is in our hands to provide a good environment for our daughter, so that she will grow up to be a godly woman. That’s daunting to me. Add to that knowing about all the new things around for our daughter that we didn’t even deal with as kids, like the internet. Just having an email address, attracts all sorts of nasty emails even. Even without seeking information like that, you get it delivered right to your inbox. It’s also tough knowing that we will have countless, tough conversations that end with her being really hacked off at me.

So, how do you handle those tough parts of being a dad?
1) Certainly, I need to pray.
2) I am intentional to communicate with my spouse about how I’m feeling.
3) I look at some of the tough stuff in context, and find the blessing in it. For example, dealing with the sleep stuff (our daughter still doesn’t sleep well at two years) has been hard because we’ve felt so alone in that issue. It helps me to think back and remember sleep is the only major issue we’ve had with her, and we don’t sleep a lot anyway. In some ways, this could be a blessing.
4) I’ll prepare in advance. We haven’t had to have any of those “tough conversations” with our daughter yet, but for me it will help to think about beforehand how we’re going to answer those tough questions. Discussing our answers will help me ensure I’m clear on the point I want to get across so I can focus on conveying it (not what I’m trying to say). Plus, it helps me make sure I completely agree with what I think the answer should be.

What makes parenting a high calling?
It’s one of the biggest tasks God has given us to do. He has entrusted us with this little person that we totally shape and prepare for life. When you boil it down, the way we interact with her is going to form the basis for all of her experiences and how she lives her life. We must be willing and intentional to talk to her about Christ, what He did, and what that means. How we model our spiritual walks will influence hers. We must also be willing to talk about drugs, boys, and all those other tough issues. The way we interact as a married couple and parents will impact the way she sees relationships, who she dates, and the type of parent she’ll be. It’s a big responsibility.

How do we live up to that high calling?
The only way is to rely on God. That said, we provide the best example we can by living in the most Christ-like manner possible. We have to model that for our children. Secondly, we should be very involved with our children. When they’re in school, we should find out who their friends are, know what they have coming up in classes, study with them, attend their games or activities, and ask them how they are doing. Growing up, my mom studied with me all the time, and I can specifically remember thinking that she was sacrificing whatever she might want to do at that moment just so she could be with me and help me do my best in school.

What has being a parent taught you about your relationship with God?
It’s made me more aware of how big a sacrifice it is to give up your child. I mean, next to losing you (my wife), giving up our daughter would be the worst thing I could imagine. Parenthood gives me a greater appreciation and deeper gratitude for God’s sacrifice of His only son. It provides me with insight into the enormity of what He did for us.

Thanks, babe. You’re one amazing father who teaches me about our heavenly Father all the time.

To read the interviews in this series, click here.

For more insight and inspiration, check out High Calling Blogs.

Parenting Spotlight #1

I’m excited to begin this little series on parenting, and I’m thrilled that my mother agreed to be the first interview.

A little over thirty years ago, my parents received a phone call that their baby girl arrived two weeks earlier than expected. They left the hospital with me and a receipt for “one baby girl.” My dad still has it tucked safely away (the receipt, that is!). I’ve always known that I’m adopted, and although on occasion I’ve been mildly curious about my birth parents, I’ve never felt like a piece of my childhood or history is missing. I’ve never gone searching because I already know who my parents are.

My deep desire is that my daughter and I have the type of relationship my mom and I have. I enjoy my time with my mom, and I miss her when we haven’t connected in a while. I appreciate so much about her parenting, even as she continues to encourage me in my own parenting.

So without further ado, here’s my mom.

Hi, mom! Let’s jump right in. Tell me the story about how becoming a parent affected your walk with Christ.

When I became your mother, it was very humbling. All I really did to get you was answer a lot (I mean, a lot!) of questions and pass a clean house inspection. At that time in my life, I was very self-sufficient (the strong, Yankee, military wife – I am woman; hear me roar!) and thought I could handle just about anything thrown my way. But I just couldn’t get pregnant. And so God blessed me and humbled me by giving me a child: the very thing I could not do myself or control. I knew that God was in the gift-giving business, so I easily comprehended the gift of His Son (NOT easy to comprehend the sacrifice of His Son). The humbling part was that your father and I were “chosen” to be your parents by both God and your birth mother. I always believed in God, but did not understand the sacrifice He made to bring me into His kingdom. I started seeking the One who “chose” me to be your mother and, as I later learned, “chose” me to be His child.

When you were little, I used to sing to you the song I learned in Girl Scouts so many years ago. You have heard me sing it over the years. In fact, I still sing it, usually on the way to work when I am alone in the car:

God gave the wise men their wisdom, and to the poets their dreams;
To mother and father, their love for each other, but He left me out, so it seems.
I went around broken-hearted, thinking life was an empty affair.
But when God gave me you, it was then that I knew,
He had given me more than my share!

I can say without reservation, the song quoted above refers to my Lord, my precious daughter, my unwavering husband, my devoted son-in-law, and the cutest granddaughter on the face of this earth!!!!

How did you incorporate God and the Bible into our daily lives?

Hmmm . . . You know, I don’t remember making a conscious effort to do that; it just happened very naturally. Since you were such a talker anyway (who me?), we talked about what you learned in Sunday school and church school. We prayed together every night and at meals, so we set that example for you. Awana played a big part in setting off discussions because I wanted you to understand what you were memorizing, and we would work on those lessons together. When a puzzling issue came up, particularly when you were older, we would talk about the biblical perspective. You watched your father and I work on and attend Bible studies. You saw us make church, our fellow church people, and others a priority in our lives. We taught you the real meaning of Christmas and Easter. Oh, I guess I can say that we did not make a conscious effort to incorporate God and the Bible into our daily lives, we just tried to live a Christian life.

What has being a parent taught you about your relationship with God?

Being a Mom has taught me a lot about patience and learning that I do not come first. Being a parent has taught me that you never stop learning how to parent. You just get a handle on one stage, and then you are catapulted into the next – swimming upstream, grabbing for every branch of knowledge that whips by your head or slaps you in the face. God is much better at parenting (oh, the patience! the love! the grace!). Children do silly, stupid and immature things (that sometimes bring disgrace to their parents). So do I.

If I were to say to you, “Parenting is a high calling” What does that mean to you?
I’ll use Dr. Dobson’s words here: the role of a parent is to raise a child to be independently dependent on the Lord. You can raise a child to be a morally responsible adult and maybe even do good things, but that does not automatically mean that child will have a relationship with the Lord. When Jesus said to His disciples “follow Me,” it was more that just go where I go and do what I do. He was saying to them, “I have chosen you (as a rabbi chose his students) and you can be like me.” He taught them and set the ultimate example. As parents and disciples, we do the same. There is no higher calling!

How can we as parents see the daily tasks of raising our children as holy work?

Operative words here – daily tasks! Laundry, poopy diapers, dishes, mud, reading the same book a million times, cooking, shopping, vomiting – did I mention poopy diapers? You get the idea. Like I said in the last question, as parents and disciples we set the ultimate (earthly) example in how we conduct ourselves as we go about the “dailies” of our daily lives. Our children take it all in! Do we make mistakes – you betcha! Can we learn from our mistakes – you betcha! God teaches us with love (there may be a spanking here and there), and we do the same. That’s holy work.

Thanks, Mom. I continue to learn so much from you!

To read the interviews in this series, click here.

For more insight into seeing parenting as a High Calling, please check out the other blogs in our network. Check back next Thursday when I shine the spotlight on my precious husband who is an amazing dad.