spaghettipie

The Joy of Repentance

I spent the first part of the song forcing back the tears that were bubbling up inside me.

Everyone needs compassion,
Love that’s never failing;
Let mercy fall on me.

Everyone needs forgiveness,
The kindness of a Savior;
The Hope of nations.

But when we began singing the chorus, I couldn’t stop them. I began to weep.

Savior, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.

Forever, Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave.

At first, I wasn’t even sure why I was crying – the pregnancy hormones, the lack of protein for dinner, the fatigue, the weight of all that had been going on in our lives . . . but when we sang the words “My God is mighty to save” what I felt was conviction, and my soul sobbed. I couldn’t even put into words the depth of that pain, couldn’t pray to the Father for forgiveness. All I could do was let the tears fall. My God is mighty. I had been rejecting that as truth. He’s mighty to save. Period. And yet I had limited his power by accepting he was mighty to save only some and not others.

Romans 8:26-27 says, “In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.” In a way I’ve not experienced before, I understood how the Holy Spirit is our intercessor. Through words of a song I could not sing and tears I could not stop, I confessed my sin before the Lord. In fact, I didn’t really fully understand my sin until today as I began processing that moment again. But I know that in that moment, I received his forgiveness anyway.

Oh that we all may know the working of the Holy Spirit and the joy of repentance! He is mighty to save. He has the power to forgive and redeem.  And he loves me so intimately, so tenderly, that I can come to him without words, and he knows my heart.

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6 comments

  1. Krista Sanders

    “Beautiful” was my first thought too. Forgiveness has been on my mind a lot lately. Loved your words.

  2. spaghettipie

    S, OM, MD, and KS – Thanks so much for the kind words. It was definitely a new and moving experience for me.

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